...the 'n' word

I have a hard time with the 'n' word.
I rarely say it.
Don't get me wrong - I would LOVE to be able to say it.
Sometimes I leave a conversation and wonder 'why in the world did I just not say the 'n' word???'.
Maybe I should practice saying it in front of the mirror.

Instead, I say the 'y' word...
...and that usually creates lots of work for me.

The 'n' word is 'no'...
...and, I'm a 'yes' girl.
(Really people, what did you think I was talking about? ...geez)

I have many forms of yes, differing in degrees of sincerity:
Sure
Ok
I would love to
Well, if you think its a good idea
Umm, maybe (my 'maybe' means yes usually...)

The recent dilemma:
Wanting to say 'y', but having to say 'n' for various reasons.
Makes me want to say 'f' it!
(ahhhh, another one you will rarely hear from me....)