...pity party

Funk.
Funky funk..
Funkity funk...


I'm not talking about the 'cool' funk...
I'm talking about the 'cloud over your head' funk...
That's me.

I am down.
With no good reason.
Down, just to be down.

This is not like me.
I am the up girl.
The one with the smile.
The one that - well, makes others smile...

So, what's the problem?
I can't pinpoint it.

I know I am so very blessed.
Positive things lately...
- Great friends
- Great family
- Great times

People love me, and I know it. (I hope that doesn't sound bad or vein. I don't mean it like that).
Life is good, and I know it.
And, I figured out tonight - oh yes, I can bake bread from scratch!
So...what's missing?

Ugh.

Let me refocus.
Let me find all the great amongst my want to complain.
Lord, let me be the one you created me to be.
There is more to me, I know...
Reveal more of Your plan. Please.
But it if is not time...let me be thankful for today.
Because today, will lead to tomorrow.
And tomorrow, will be GREAT - I can feel it. :-)

Remember January's 'To-Do' List?

See below...here's where I am...

Learn to make pasta- Check...blogged this one. And I will be making pasta again soon!

Craft something (and it not be crappy) -  Remember the felt flower pins, and I didn't blog about the sweet crafty painted bunnies. So fun! :-) 

Run another ½ marathon - THIS WEEKEND!!!!! Louisville, here I come!

Ski – water or snow - Getting there...it'll be water skiing now, snow skiing weather is over.

Finish reading the Bible - Need focus here...big time. :-(

Forgive myself - Working on this, getting closer....

Sleep more - Did I mention, I slept 10 hrs last night...

Run my toes in the sand - Beach countdown is at ~3 weeks!!!!

Go car camping - CHECK MARK, remember last weekend...?

Take my parents somewhere new - Mom and Dad came to Church with me for Easter. I am going to count this as somewhere new, but I want to leave this one open. I want to do more with them in the coming months.

Thanks for reading.
And thanks for caring.
I blog.
It helps me.
It keeps me accountable.
To myself.
Because...it's all about me!
;-)

So, a song for me...to help me remember, 'in the middle of my littleness, I forgot how big I'm blessed'...

...give me a tool and stand back

Have I ever mention, I LOVE hard work?
I am starting to think I am a very weird girl....
(math, nerdy, Dave Ramsey, gym, running, camping, work, .... quick - someone, give me some nail polish and eye liner...)

Anyways...tonight I had the opportunity to demo some kitchen countertops!
OOOOH yes!
(and my price: a pork chop, some veggies, and rice... I need to work up an invoice...)

My friend is re-doing her kitchen, and I have been telling her for ages to let me know when she needs help. I love this kind of stuff. I think she was reluctant. I think that she thought I was just being kind by offering. But, I mean it...I enjoy it so much. :-)

Some quick snapshots...kitchen with counters:

 Ignore the gym clothes...but don't ignore my head lamp! This is the MOST AWESOME accessory EVER for working. It's not just for camping friends. With this baby, you don't have to awkwardly try to pin a flashlight between your head and shoulder. No more neck cramps!
Demo in progress:

 Woo hoo...counters gone on one side of the kitchen...

 Other side, another story. Thanks contractors for using liquid nails to glue the side peices on. That was AWESOME to remove....

 So awesome that (ooops) the drywall came off with it. Ugh. PLEASE, granite guys, bring a backsplash with you....

Whew...work a full day, go to the gym, dinner and demo! Nice day. I earned my sleep tonight...
:-)

Good night friends.
Call me when you work, I mean it...and, I'm not even a picky eater. Geez...I am a deal!

...those moments

You know those moments; the ones that stick with you:
Just as the sun is coming up, peaking between trees...
When the fire is warm and the air is crisp...
Crawling in the tent, and zipping up all snug for the night...
When the smell of a camp fire, eggs, bacon, and coffee fill the morning air...
Placing footsteps carefully on the trail and feeling just a touch of earth sliding under your feet...
Turning the bend, and hearing running water...turning the next bend, and finding a gorgeous waterfall...
When the fog is thick and milky...
Watching the sun set...
Resting your head on the back of the chair and watching the clouds glide past the moon...
Lighting the first small twigs, stoking, and building that first fire of the morning...
Nature...
...and, coming home to a HOT SHOWER!!!! :-)

We left on Friday afternoon. The original plan was to leave early, but the weather was TERRIBLE. So, we arrived hours later than planned. And, we arrived one tent short... ~Walmart run. But, late Friday evening - camp was set. Fire was going. Dinner in the pot: Jambalaya with sausage and shrimp. There are few things better than a dinner cooked on the fire and enjoyed from a camping chair.

Bedtime…cozy…+30 deg mummy bag…money well spent. I was warm and snug…and so mummified that my friend woke up to me missing in the bag, head completely covered. J Once she was convinced I was breathing, off to sleep she went again.

I like being the first to wake up, starting the fire, sitting alone next to the fire, closing my eyes, listening, feeling, breathing, being. It's a treat...a pleasure...a blessing. I like greeting folks with a ‘good morning’ and a smile (but, then again, I like doing that every day…).

I like hiking, trees, leaves, flowers, water, earth…

I like it all – even dodging poison oak, and ticks, and other creepy crawlies…I am invading their home, so I can’t complain about them being there.

Car camping: big super checkmark on that ‘to-do’ list. I hope to do this many more times this summer!

Just a few pics…

First night....

 Home for 2 nights...yes, that is the sun peaking over the tent....LOVELY!

 Bacon!

 The girls...ready to hike.

Next 3 pics, a gorgeous waterfall on the trail...

 Sunset over Smith Lake...

 Steaks on the fire...

 Last morning laziness...

 Happiness...

Good times!
I have been home for 3 hours. All the camping clothes are washed, the sleeping bag is aired out, and I am ready for bed. Tomorrow, the only signs of camping will be some sore muscles and some itching (poison oak?).

Dear Wilderness, I will visit again soon. Until then, stay beautiful! Love and hugs, Nancy

...happy camper?

Tomorrow...I go camping...
We'll see how happy I am come Monday....

It's been a long time...
I have a new sleeping bag...
Latern...
Band-aids...cause yes, I plan like that...

But, TERRIBLE weather is in the forecast.
It's okay though.
Do not fear.
I also have a box of wine.
Classy, eh?
(don't judge...)

We met on Tues night to discuss....the plan.
Yes, I prepared the spreadsheet afterwards...
I know - crazy. A camping spreadsheet.
That's Nancy for you....

Speaking of bad weather.
This cracked me up...what transpired on FB tonight:
 packing for a camping trip...what does one wear to a tornado? inputs plz...

responses from friends: 

• A basement.
• Watch old news of people being interviewed after a tornado. U need fewer teeth, cigarettes, some sort of college tshirt from a school u did not go to and a mullet!
• ME: anonymous friend: "BREAK-AWAY CLOTHES!!!!! Bwahahahahaha!" - I'll let you guess the gender....
• maybe we should wear marilyn monroe skirts!!!
• A moo-moo and rollers are a must if you are going with the theme.
• ME: but i don't have any pink flamingos to put outside the tent! i see a dollar general run on the way to the campsite...
• Just put some Christmas lights and decorations on and around your tent along with an old toilet and a bike with no wheels. That should do it justice!
• ME: Friend, you know far too much...are you a storm chaser???
• No, just very familiar with what seems to attract a tornado. Don't judge!
• A helmet, definitely a helmet!!
• and (from dance studio) practice "IT SOUNDED LIKE A FREIGHT TRAIN!!!!!"

Have I ever mentioned?....I have great friends.... :-)

Good night all....hope to be blogging in a few nights...safe, dry, and warm from the comforts of...well, not the woods!!!

...the status line

I have been filling out a lot of paperwork lately.

That happens when you change your name.

 

And, well - a new struggle has hit me.

What the heck is my status?

This is usually an emotional question...like 'how are you doing?'

Or a Facebook question...like the 'what's on your mind?' box that is there every time you log in.

But, when you have to check the box on an official form, it strikes you differently...

 

 

Single, Married, Widowed, Divorced.

Those are the choices.

 

And, while I am divorced - I am also single.

Why isn't it just Single, Married, Widowed?

And, what about those who are widowed - how does it make them feel to check that box?

It's a little cruel if you ask me.

Either you are single, or you are married.

 

Coming to terms.

It's a struggle.

I know I am not alone. Many have been there before me, many will come after.

My new doctor asked me about stress today. I asked him how much time he had and if he was also a psychiatrist. He smiled.

 

Truth is - life is a process.

Church this week....good message:

Being the 'you' that you are....and moving toward the 'you' that you were created to be.

The path from A to B is the transformation that needs to take place in you.

The closer you get to who you are created to be, the less transforming you need to do.

Nice.

I am working toward the new me.

 

I found this interesting..you may too. It's more applicable to a single event, and not your overall life. But it does make you think about how you approach and work through situations:

 

No gonna say where I am in the circle, but here's a hint - somewhere between chaos and order! :-)

 

Also, at church this week...I signed my name in the book as my maiden name. 

...figured that would be a good place to start new! It was a little moment for me....

...on the hunt

I've been searching.
High and low.
Searching for something I am not sure I am ready to have.
Something that signifies a new me.
A new chapter.
A new everything...
...even a new address.

You got it, this gypsy girl is house hunting.

Am I stupid to be nervous and anxious about this?
I want a house.
Recent reasons to want to move AGAIN...

• The apartment is unwilling to reason with me on my new rates if I decide to sign a lease.
• ~Interest rates are low :-)
• It's time.
• Tonight, it was RAINING HARD, and well - I have to park in the lot, run through the rain, and under the overhang that does NOT have a gutter. I was SOAKED in less than 10 seconds. (call me a diva, I'll live!)
• Late last night, I figured out the neighbor must have gotten a new puppy...(imagine this *not so* pleasant surprise...)

So, I found a house I am interested in today.
It's small.
It's cute.
It has 2 walk in closets in the master bedroom.
This should be a no-brainer.

But, I am scared.
Don't ask why - I don't really know.
The stupid reasons...

• What if something breaks and I don't know what to do?
• What if I don't like the neighbors/they don't like me?
• What if I don't feel like cutting grass...I'm too cheap to pay someone. Ugh.
• What if it is haunted?

The *more to the point* reasons...

• What if I lose my job...
• What if something is wrong with the house and I don't know it...
• What if I meet someone and fall in love, and have yet another house to sell...
• What if I don't meet anyone (ok, this has nothing to do with the house...this is a topic for another post, another night...)

So, I'll pray.
And think.
And run the numbers, because I am a nerd.

About the 'heart for sale'...I got this from a precious friend today.
WOW...I think this just might be one of my new favorite quotes:
"Don't be a woman that needs a man. Be a woman a man needs."

I wonder, are there any men who need a woman who needs her grass cut?
...a deal could be worked out...
...just sayin...

...you can't make up this sort of thing

Today got away from me.
I meant to cook, but time passed...and when I FINALLY got started - the chicken was completely frozen.
I tried to thaw it.
I tried to go ahead and pop it in the oven early.
...and, well, it was 7:30pm - the chicken was still frozen and I was STARVING.

I made the decision...
...go pick up dinner.
Ugh.

MeiWei is nearby and I have never tried it.
I ordered, sat down, waited patiently.
It felt like it took ages...
I watched and finally - it was boxed.
Then, it sat there - waiting for someone to take it from the kitchen counter and turn around and give it to me.
...have I ever mentioned, I get irritable when I am hungry?
I was patient though, didn't say a word.
Finally, they took it from the counter - slowlyyyyy place it in a brown bag.
Slowlyyyyyy put my fork, napkin, and fortune cookie in the bag.
Slowlyyyyyy folded the bag over and closed it with a MeiWei sticker (remember this part of the story...).

I politely thanked them.
And drove home like a maniac.
When I got out of the car, I noticed the bag was open and the sticker was missing.
Whatever.
I ran up stairs, grabbed the fortune cookie (am I the only one who eats this first?).

Check it out:

Me, humorous?
I try, but I don't think I'm really all that funny.
So I devour the cookie.

I happen to rub my hand down my backside.
And guess what I find...

It totally cracked me up.
How the heck did that happen?

Despite being mad at the frozen chicken, starving to death, patience being stretched by the folks at MeiWei, and smirking at my fortune - this sticker summed it all up. Life is funny! And, I'm gonna share it. :-)

FYI - here's what I got, and I highly recommend it!

Spicy Thai Fried Rice: Fried rice cooked with a blend of special Thai herbs, eggs, diced onions, scallions, peppers, jalapenos, pineapple, Thai basil, cilantro and cashew nuts.

Hope you enjoyed your weekend!

Oh, and in case you were wondering....a frozen chicken takes 272 hours to bake. (and, I rounded down to the nearest hour).
;-)

...food makes people happy

have i ever mentioned...i love to cook?
i really do.
i think it's fun.
i like the measuring, pouring, stirring, mixing, etc.
i like getting my hands dirty (except for handling chicken...that kinda grosses me out)
i like smelling it while it cooks.
i like the watching it bake or boil or saute.

but most of all, i like the sharing it with other people part.
i like to see someone smile.
i like to watch someone enjoying something that i worked to prepare.

do i think i am a great cook? - absolutely not.
i do not follow recipes ...
i do not measure right ...
i skip some ingredients or substitute whenever i want to.
and, sometimes it does NOT work out, but that's ok.

food makes people happy - which makes me happy...so, it's really all about me! :-)

i made these things for work today, and i loved sharing it.

Wake-Up-Casserole
...i didn't have dry mustard, so i used dijon. whatever, it was good!

Banana-Peanut-Butter-Bread
...i don't like crunchy PB, and i didn't have walnuts - do you think anyone noticed?

Sausage-Pinwheels
...i've made these often, very often. they are CHEAP and GOOD. i have never put chives in it. and, it is always a hit.

i love to cook.
...any requests? :-)

ps - high cholesterol issues...i think the doctor is going to take me off cheese - and i LOVE cheese. dang it. we'll see next week!

...blogger blues

Guess who has the BLUES?
Not the real blues...not the 'down on life' blues.
I have the blogger blues.
The kind where I have had brain block.
Nothing clever comes to mind when it comes to the blog.
...and, well, I've been busy.

Nothing really big to report.
Lots of running around.
Lots of running.
I was sick on Saturday - which was no fun.
I enjoyed church this week.
I have been looking at houses to buy, nothing really has grabbed me yet.
My last week of Dave Ramsey is this week (I volunteered for the next session, starting in May.)
Work is going well.
It's storming right now...the door to the screen porch is open. That's pretty nice.
I am watching Grey's Anatomy ~now addicted~
I plan on having soup for dinner.
...see, I got a whole bunch of nothing...
...there is a mental block...

It's April now....I will:

• Read 'The Happiness Project' for this month
• Go car camping!
• Run a 1/2 marathon!
• Start swimming...I committed to a triatholon! (scared: horrible swimmer!...)
• Work hard at work
• Go to Church
• ooooh, I am going to be a coach at Dale Carnegie "Effective Communications and Human Relations " class. THAT should be good for a blog post or two. ;-)
• what else....
• I might go see a musical with a friend.
• ugh, I have a doctor appointment, guess who has high cholesterol? :-(

That's enough, April looks like it is already gone.

Then, it'll be May and May = Annual Beach Trip with the girls!

Let me leave you with a cool song...still digging on the Christian music, sooo uplifting!

...signing off, soup time...